Every Persona has two sides of a coin, with traits that are automatic for us. 

To be born with them you have both sides, light and shadow. We struggle with our shadow and shine with our light.  As you become more aware of their influence and learn how to own and work with both, you literally transform. In effect, your specific six Persona shadows describe in detail, your school of life curriculum of lessons you came to master. Your collection of life lessons are not easy. Every time you recognise, own and release an aspect of shadow, life starts to flow a little easier and your light shines more often.

All Persona shadow comes from a place of deep pain, historic trauma and self-rejection.

When you are 'in' one of your Persona's shadows you are acting out from a place that you would rather hide, repress, avoid and deny. There is no conscious decision-making, just reactivity in that Persona's personal style. You’ve probably learnt how to manage some of your shadows over time, but most of us still go there when we are struggling. Shadows are never fully mastered, because we’re always ‘becoming’. Your dominant shadows repeatedly get you into trouble in the same ways and for the same reasons. 

Our light traits are our natural character-strengths and talents. They name the best of us when we are grounded, secure and aligned within. Our Personas light also includes specific aptitudes and gifts we have. They are innate, but still need work to be developed to their maximum potential. 

Light character traits include respect, patience, generosity, compassion, wisdom, integrity, courage, honesty, discipline, focus etc. There’s a very long list. We take our light traits for granted at times because they do come naturally. However, we can also greatly admire and even envy the light traits of Personas we don’t have, because they certainly do not come naturally to us.

Our hurt inner Child: When living from this place, we’re consumed and driven by our shadows. We live an unconscious life, meaning we are unaware that our deep-seated fears are ruling our choices and making our life harder. When living from Child we are focused on the past, and in fear that the pain in our past, will also be our future. Our coping strategies to try to avoid revisiting past pain, actually guarantees our ongoing pain. We drown in ‘fear-pain-blame’ victimhood. The world becomes divided into ‘us vs them.’

Our inner Adult-parent: When living from this place we attend to our hurt Child in the present moment. It’s a daily, life-long task which we often neglect. Our Child unconsciously keeps seeking others, especially partners, to be the one to ‘fix’ and ‘parent’ us. This never works, it must come from within. The inner Adult-parent provides the antidotes to Child fear-pain-blame, with daily self-love and reassurance.  

Becoming an inner Adult is a hero’s journey. It starts with owning not blaming.

Our inner Elder:  When living from this place, our focus is our collective future. We’re intent on mentoring others and helping to heal our world. Most never graduate to Elder. Elders repeatedly go within owning all when in crisis, hurt or betrayed. They seek the depths within their soul and integrate all darkness. They heal their fears and pain, as it’s here where we find our hidden jewels. Their wisdom comes from truly knowing the purpose and gifts of times lost in darkness. This is the Elder’s highest potential and light-genius. They bless others by helping them find their way ‘home’. With self-mastery they live to be of service and offer world-love. Elders embrace ‘our humanity’, love, compassion and a unifying vision of 'we are one'. Of course, all Elders slip back into Child as well, but far less often and for shorter periods.

Self-parenting is the key to this work. 

Early on in this work you will begin to identify areas where your inner Child plays a big part in your life:

• You will learn to universally accept that this Inner Child is part of you 
• You will learn the reason why this part of you  keeps 'falling in to Child'
• You will learn to reassure and wholeheartedly love this inner Child 
• And finally you will learn to self parent your inner Child so that they no longer need to be in charge of how you feel and behave 

Just as you would not let a literal 5 year old drive a bus, you should not let your inner 5 year old drive your decision-making bus.

You will self-parent with your inner Adult. This role requires years of inner work to fully develop. When triggered and in Child, the Adult goes inwards and down, into our fear and pain. 

Our inner Adult owns our shadow lessons and finds out, through trial and error, how best to support and manage our inner Child. 

The Adult is here to master genuine self-love in the present. When our inner Adult forms, we feel unconditionally loved, seen and validated.